Apart from relationship with parent, sibling and spouse. Friends is the earliest human bond without any blood relation and contract (marriage). Thus, it a very unique human bond that happens without we realized and that piqued my interest to understand what friends are since high school. My schoolmates labeled me as Arrogant since I always with myself but at the same time I was observing others from the corner of my classroom. Observed the smile, the laughed they made, sometimes they bickering each other discussing on certain topic and those made me smile in background. In my heart said: “I wish to preserve this kind of surrounding forever with the price I no need to be here with them if it only destroy the harmony”. Kinda messed up for high school student.
Nevertheless, I kept figuring what friend is? And the method I used during university is not try to differentiate and get experience as much as I could including joined Reserve Officer Training Unit (Army). Until one night I have deep conversation with roommates what friend from 4 years in university.
I can’t tell you what friend is, nobody could. But I could tell how you know you have one. And how they behaved around you. Some people said you become friends when both have common values and belief. It could be but it is not always the case. You could be friends despite with different religion belief and culture or even nationalities. Some said we became friend due to similar hobbies and interest, you could become one but it not always the case. You both can become friend despite different hobbies for example I am not a fan of video gaming but my friend does. Mostly, you don’t even realized when you become friends.
Thus, how they become one? 2 conditions — first you both have similar destination and second, they are the people around you or could say within in your community. When 2 souls share the similar destination, you basically in similar road moving together and you could choose either keep solo or be in group/partner. There are things we never could be done by alone so that where people you encounter in the same path come in rescue. For example, we made friends in university and we all have similar destination which is graduation. But to get there, you could not be done alone. You might need study group, assignment group and project group.
How they behaved? Imagine the imaginary gap between stranger and siblings. That is where they belong. Some time they treat you like a brother and sister but sometimes they treat you like stranger. Then it comes to famous question from female friends, could a man and women could be friends? If the male sees you(female) like his own sister without any sexual desires from both are you or involve in sexual activity, then you can be friend but either that man have mental disorder or that woman is ugly.
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